Author Archives: Alden

Parks & Rec: 2-1 Pawnee Zoo

Posted on December 27, 2016 by Alden

Plot: Leslie accidentally marries two male penguins. Mark hits on Ann. Andy is living in the pit and stalking Ann.  Deep Thoughts: I love how dated this episode feels. It’s only from 2009, but I think it would play differently today, … Continue reading →

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I know it completely won’t matter but

Posted on December 15, 2016 by Alden

A letter to CVS Caremark*, on the occasion of my prescription’s increasing 1009% in one month, because I had exhausted my “one trial month” and now need to switch to either mail order or a CVS store:

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Hillary’s child sex ring and other YOU ARE A MORON

Posted on December 5, 2016 by Alden

Toward the end of the campaign I saw a couple of my Trump-enabled acquaintances refer to Hillary as a pedophile. I didn’t even ask, because by that point their rants were so nonsensical as to not be worth my time. … Continue reading →

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What do we actually DO now?

Posted on December 2, 2016 by Alden

Well, 2016 was fun, right? And we’ve all been wallowing in the not-fun for a couple of weeks now at the very least. I personally am tired of the wallowing. I’ve decided to put some of my money where my … Continue reading →

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Ghostbusters: Not All Women

Posted on July 17, 2016 by Alden

And that’s exactly the problem. The subject doesn’t come up at all. It’s like this movie is the #NotAllWomen of summer films. It bends over backwards not to be about its most obvious feature. Continue reading →

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The Judge Who Didn’t

Posted on February 4, 2016 by Alden

“Good morning!” the judge says, too cheerfully. Nobody replies. “I’ll try that again… Good morning!” Under the bailiff’s glare, the motley crew on the uncomfortable benches manages to mutter out a response. Nobody else looks nearly as excited to be there. In … Continue reading →

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Sometimes the cheese works

Posted on October 7, 2015 by Alden

The Close-of-Service “Letter to Yourself” (Cross-posted at my other blog, Diary of the Desert.) Tuesday, September 18, 2001. It’s your (my) last day in Bayt Yafa. Surprisingly typical: I had breakfast upstairs. We watched the new miniseries, but it isn’t … Continue reading →

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The River & The Mayor

Posted on September 23, 2015 by Alden

This is a story about the time I ended up in a cabinet meeting with the Mayor of Wuhan. But before it gets there, I have to talk about diarrhea and vomit. Diarrhea is a natural thing we don’t talk … Continue reading →

Posted in Letters to the Past | Leave a comment

Just Kidding

Posted on September 15, 2015 by Alden

Turns out Alfred’s peeps did reply. Bless their hearts. I mean, even with a misspelling or two, that’s a nice note to a kid. Perhaps we will meet again, AHMM.

Posted in Letters to the Past | 3 Comments

Death Blobs of the Past

Posted on September 15, 2015 by Alden

When this self-employment thing isn’t going so well, I will be able to tell myself I’ve been getting rejections for a very long time. Or passive non-response rejections, anyway. [ETA: they did reply, and kindly, even if it was indeed … Continue reading →

Posted in Letters to the Past | 4 Comments